11.02.2010

The toughest week thus far... BUT WE ARE ALRIGHT! (random post)

I have been MIA since last Friday. I don't really want to be absent in posting since I truly love the time when I sit down, free my mind from any concerns, and just write... and share what's inside this very open heart of mine. Blogging actually de-stresses me from the trivial problems I face day to day as a wife, mom, daughter, sister, friend, and in some cases, stranger, for those who respond a little negatively to my blog. So, for me to miss my  "venting" moment, would just mean that I am just unbelievably tired, or something major has happened. In the case of my 4 days of absence, something major did happened... "majors" actually...

For starters, my youngest sister is about to give birth any day now. Her husband is in deployment, so she's a little rattled with him, possibly, not being there when this major event happens. You may ask why this pregnancy is important. Well, it's important to me because if you know my sister, you will also know that this baby is nothing short of a miracle. She's lost 2 babies before and being pregnant with Caleb (isn't that a cute name? I reluctantly gave it to her! That's another story...lol!) is her kiss of heaven. I know that this is a long-awaited moment and I also know that I will not hear the end of it if I miss the "event". But then again, flying to Hawaii at a moment's notice is not AT ALL feasible at this point. So, I might really miss my nephew's birth and really not hear the end of it. I'll just brace myself in December when we get there.

Second major thing is not at all a new thing, but still a thing that bothers me. It' my thyroid problem. Ugh! I know... but I just found out that the reason I have hyperthyroidism is because I have Graves' disease! Sounds serious huh? But not really. With my limited (but slowly expanding) knowledge of my problem is that it's an auto-immune disease. Ok fine, I really didn't understand what an auto-immune disease was, but my endocrinologist said that it's basically my body attacking my thyroid and my thyroid overcompensates producing the thyroid hormone to combat it. Now I'm in antithyroid meds that I was hesistant to take initially, but my doctor told me the statistics of people having adverse side effects to the meds, and being that the odds are for me (as it's said in Psalm 121:7), I know that I will be a part of that percentage that WILL NOT have side effects! Yes and AMEN!

Okay, the last thing we (and when I say we I mean my Ona Family) found out that really scared me to my corest of core is when my Papa's colonoscopy test came back positive with lymphoma. Lymphoma is a type of cancer that affects the cells that play a role in the immune system. When I found out about this, I was just shocked. Shocked like I've never felt before... it's like somebody hit me hard in my chest, I couldn't breathe! I guess it was so hard for me because at that time, my Papa and I had a disagreement two days prior and we still weren't talking. I guess I was flooded with guilt and shame, and the fact that my dad, who I still think is larger than life, is facing this situation (I can't say the C word anymore!). Thank God that after he saw his oncologist yesterday, we all felt a little better. His doctor is so hopeful that this isn't going to be as difficult as how others would have it. And as a family, I know that, for better or worse, we are going to be aggressive with my Papa in fighting this. This will not define him and it most certainly will not be the end of him. My Papa has a God, so strong! So mighty! There's nothing that our God can't do!

So there, after a few days of having to deal with mostly the my overwhelmed emotions, as of now, 2:11 am, Tuesday, Nov.2, I can bravely say, I am fine! And we are all going to be alright as Jesus is very much so alright with us! Oh, and back to "venting" for me! TTYL!

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